What Hill?

"The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time, any fool can do it, there ain't nothin' to it.  Nobody knows how we got to the top of the hill...but since we're on our way down, might as well enjoy the ride."    -James Taylor

   

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      I had dinner with a sweet, young, new-hire named Xiul (See Uhl).  We were talking about how tiring the job can be.  I told her about when I was a new-hire in New York.  I'd come in from these 10 hour all-night international flights, drag my bags through the city, and finally get to my apartment.  I remember looking up from the bottom of the four flights of stairs, wondering how I was going to get myself and my bags all the way up to my apartment.

     Xiul earnestly listened, nodded, and was, obviously, trying to picture the scene.

     She said:  "Were you skinny then?"

     I'd love to write that I came across the table, grabbed her by the collar and said:  "Listen, little missie!  I'll have you know I'm one hot ticket down at the retirement community!"

    That would be funny, right?!  Ya know, in that 'Fried Green Tomatoes'-"I'm older and have more insurance than you!"-kind of way.

    But Xiul doesn't have a mean bone in her body.   Instead, I opened my mouth to continue talking, sat there with nothing coming out, and finally said:  "Uh, yeah, I was skinny then."  I didn't even sarcastically emphasize the word 'then'.  She weighed about 90 pounds.  I realized we live in different realities.

     Xiul and I were flying with a funny, and slim! (...in my world, anyhow) male flight attendant, called Slew.  (Yeah - Michael didn't believe the names either.)

     Xiul said to Slew:  "Wow!  You're older than my mom!"

     Yeah.  She was an equal-opportunity self-esteem-wrecker.

     Slew told me he was going to have to change his approach.  Instead of picking up on the new-hires, he's going to start angling for introductions to their moms.   We worked on some new pick-up lines for him.  Stuff like:  "So...are your folks still together?", "Is your mom as cute as you?", "How old's your grandma?"...

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     I guess it's part of the natural progression of life for the next generation to crush the ego and false beliefs of the previous generation.

     I have a cousin who's older than me.  One summer I was staying with her in Sacramento and she took me to San Francisco for the day.   We walked up to a corner and she pointed at the street signs, and said:  "Here it is."

     I looked up and said:  "'Haight-Ashbury?  What's that?"

     She says to this day:  "In that moment...I became old."

     I suppose my comeuppance was long overdue.

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     During some down time between flights Slew, Xiul, and I sat in the back of the plane.  Slew and I amused ourselves by talking back and forth, as if Xiul wasn't there:

     "That Xiul needs to retake those diversity-training classes!"  I said.

     "Yeah.  I can still do my job...even if I am old!"  Slew said.

     "We could sue her for ageism!"  I said.

     "What's that you say?  I can't hear too well these days!"

     "Ageism!"  I yelled.  "She also needs to learn that we fluffy people are just as capable as anyone!"

     "Could you pass me my cane, Susan?"

     "I would if I could, Slew, but my bursitis is acting up again."...

     And on and on we went, with Xiul, interrupting with:  "Stop!!  I didn't mean anything!  I'm sorry!"  And us cackling and laughing.  (Like the evil old people we now know we are.)

   ---

     The most interesting thing, to me, was how little it bothered me.

     When I was Xiul's age I would have thought I'd be mortally wounded to hear someone make comments implying that my day had passed.  I guess being mature (age-wise, if not in my behavior) really does have it's benefits.  If someone said I've learned nothing in my life...now, that might bother me.  Though, come to think of it, I'm at a point where I'm not that interested in other people's opinions of me, in general.

     It's very freeing.

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     Xiul shared that her mom often asks:  "Xiul-Do you ever listen to what comes out of your mouth?"

     I, automatically, loved her mom...who, of course, is younger than me.

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     But I'm not worried.  I figure, being over the hill is a lot like being on a roller coaster; after the slow, cranking, nerve-wracking trip up, you finally edge over the top, and that's when things really start to get exciting.

     My plan is to just let go of the handles, throw my hands in the air, and scream "Wheeeeeeeee!!!!  

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Music Bonus!
Favorite song about aging:
James Taylor's "Secret of Life"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHWHPPHpAj8:
Second favorite song about aging:
Paul Simon's "Old"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKsjty-yT6U

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When's the last time you made someone feel old?  When's the last time someone made you feel old?  When's the last time you gave a damn about the subject?